HONEST

I just being honest with my feeling, but being honest doesn’t mean you are going to get good respond or feedback.

You maybe will get disappointed with the feedback.

GO AWAY...

"Semoga mendapt jodoh yang baik-baik"

Okay... Please go away. I have my own life to lead and for your information, I don’t need anyone to find a future groom for me.

*Dalam diam aku menangis di pojok dinding... Goodbye*

HARD...

It’s seemed very hard to forget my fantasy. It’s so hard but I will never let my tears fall through my cheeks. It’s just a fantasy teha. The fantasy that’s not even real.

So I decided to ask my books, "Will you go out with me?? You can’t say no anyway, I will stuff you into my bag and bring you out. Then you will go out with me aite?"

Fortunately, the books said, they love to go out with me. They want my sticky hand to hold them and my finger caress the pages when I read them. They said, I am so kind to ask them the question because they love me too.

Maybe the books are more fantasy than him but my medical books never contain any fantasy material. So get back to reality... He is just a mere fantasy.

paperKELIP : People said time heal everything.

CONFESSION...

I have someone I like. Yeah I really like him. I like him so so much.

I confessed to him last month and that was the stupidest thing that I have done. And I am going to back off. I mean, I am REALLY REALLY NEED to back off.

This is sad. This is not reality. I like him but yeah he don’t seem to like me back and I embarrassed myself by confessed my feeling to him. And he is not even live in my real life. He just a fantasy. He is someone I met over the internet and he has been my pal-friend since then. So, he is not my reality aite?

My friend knew that I like this guy and she said that he is just a fantasy, he is not reality pon teha. Maybe I should forget about him or just be a good friend.

Maybe I like him, and maybe I am not pon. Maybe this feeling lied to my brain and my lust for love compromised with my mind to cheat my sight about love.

OR

Maybe I am like him and love him from head to toe.

Either way... This is not reality. This is a mere fantasy.

and I read about this Perigi Cari Timba thingy in I Luv Islam, and I think I just break a rule of syariat which is, If I want to confess my heart to someone, I should use a third party to send my message to him. And... apa yang aku dah buat adalah aku sendiri yang confess kat dia. Dan aku telah memalukan diri sendiri.

Baiklah teman... I will erase this feeling by having an affair with my books. By the way, in love with books is not that bad aite? Maybe I should just marry with them. Ahahaha.

paperKELIP : When I was little, I was so naughty, boyish and stubborn. My late mama will scold me when I did somethinf terrible as a girl. she said, "Fatehah, mama gave you the name as u are a girl, I not name you as Fatah okey, please act more like Fatehah not like Fatah".

ALAHAI AUNTIE…

Hello and annoyinghaesaeyoo :)

How are ya everybody... I dah ada kat JEKARTAHH sekarang ni uolls. Eh GEWDIKK NYER, tak syuker tak syuker ... Okeyh sila lempang diri anda sendiri Fatehah Malik... ehem ehem betulkan suara dan kembali normal. Gambar di atas tiada kena mengena dengan arnab okay.

Okay... Last week I visit my auntie to beraya (of course). Then she asked me "Teha dah ada boyfriend??", with a shy shy cat smile, I answered her back "Of course lah tidak ada Cik Su" but in my heart whispered "Of course I don’t have any and I am proud of it".

When she know that I don’t have a boyfriend, she was like freak out a bit like "What!! you don’t have a BOYFRIEND! Why oh why". Tapi tiadalah pula my aunt ni menjerit. Then she said "Okay, I will find you a husband. There were a lot PETRONAS guy who didn’t marry yet". Owh... So that’s why she asked. Aku hanya jawab dengan "Ok, find me a handsome one" dalam hati dah... alahai Cik Su, susah-susah je.

Hmmm... Alahai my aunt nih. I have someone I like but... I don’t know. And I have a lots of unachieved dream too. Please don’t bring marriage subject to me because I have a very ridiculous idea about it and I just 23 years old (eh bukan ke itu umur untuk dah berkahwin?). And if she knows that I don’t have and intention to get married, I think my whole family will keep nagging me and find a 'calon' like RIGHT NOW.

Dan sebenarnya... Arwah mama dah pesan suruh kahwin paling awal umur 24 paling lewat umur 27. Itu lah agaknya kenapa my aunt macam freak out bila dengar aku tiada boyfriend.