Sunday 5 September 2010

THE RHYTM OF HISTORY

Penah tak korang bercinta, jatuh cinta, cinta monyet? I have once and I want to write it here. Nak meluahkan perasaan yang tak penah aku blow off kat sape-sape pon.

Well puppy love. Sape tak penah kan kecik-kecik dulu poyo-poyo suke kat orang kan. Suke je lah, nak bercinta haram mane lah reti time tu.

Bila dah besar siket form 5, adalah sorang mamat ni pindah masuk skol aku, kawan ngan dia pehtu lama-lama bercinta (ye ke bercinta?). Whatever. Lama gak lah kan bercinta ngan mamat 2 tahun kot, macam-macam kejadian berlaku. And everyday he will write a latter to me, and of course lah I have to write it back. Then abes SPM, aku masuk matriks, so on and on. Finally I realize that how stupid and childish I am to love someone unwillingly. Yeah he maybe love me, but I dont know if I love him, kinda confuse. Then I ask him to break up. Lama-lama aku putus dengan dia. Of course he refused at the first place. Am I a bit cruel here? Yeah maybe. So what goes around come around kan. Of course, I was dump by my second bf, and since that day I just want to be single. Single is cool right, I love it.

Then, I meet a new guy, which is my old friend, or my enemy. He is nice guy and he love me but then yesterday something happen. My fault kot.  He said that I am not ready to love someone and want to break it up. If that what you want boy, go a head. I don’t think I can handle this anymore. I hate it. I am an anti of love or love anti me. I don’t care.

If you read this, I just want you to know that I really love you, really and this is not fake. I maybe a cold hearted person, manusia takde perasaan, a dumbass, pain in the as*, an idiot. I know you love me, yeah I love the fact that you love, but sometime this love is choking me when I turn back to the past, I am afraid to be love. Okay I afraid. And when I am afraid, my feedback is absolutely negative. All negative, takde satu pon yang positive. Even I love you, I still afraid to be love.

Owh crap, I think be a single is cooler than be afraid to be love right. So what is the right choice? Jadilah single sampai ke tua, haha. Idiot fatehah.

paperKELIP : You don’t care right. Well just don’t care.

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