Dia ada cakap kat saya yang awak pernah confess kat dia, awak suke sangat kat dia tapi awak confess sebelum saya ada apa-apa hubungan dengan dia lah kan. Dia cakap biar je masa yang tentukan, saya taw, kata-kata dia tu macam bagi harapan kat awak. Saya pon tak taw nak cakap apa sebab masa tu sebelum saya ‘couple’ ngan dia.
Awak cakap, mesti dia pun pernah rasa kan macam yang awak rasa, rasa bila saya tak peduli kan dia, saya buat bodoh kat dia. Ye memang dia pernah rasa semua benda tu, saya lagi rasa, yelah saya pun suka dia, tapi dia suka kacau saya, usik saya, buat saya marah hari-hari, ejek saya, buli, etc. Layak lah saya marah, buat tak peduli kat dia kan.
Awak marah dia sebab dia tak datang jumpa awak, dia janji nak datang. Saya tak marah pun dia pergi jumpa awak, tapi dia tak datang bukan sebab saya halang, sebab dia lupa, hanset pun takde bateri, dia memang macam tu, dari dulu lagi asek lupa nak charge bateri. Kena kasi ketuk sikit baru dia lupa. Janganlah marah dia, cakap dia fake. Sorry kay, if he can’t hangout with you guys. He didn’t mean it. He kind of busy, even my message pon dia lupa nak reply.
I know you have a crush on him, you confess, and when you know that he love me, your heart is broken. Then you and him is not close anymore. But what can I do? He even feel pity for you, and me as well. Serious saya tak taw sampai lah dia cerita semua kat saya, dan saya dengan dumb nya cakap kat dia, “Kalau kita clash, then you take her as her gf, awk nak?”, saya tak suka ada orang patah hati sebab saya amek laki yang dia suke, saya tak kesah saya patah hati, asal orang laen gembira. Siyesly, sebab awak akan jumpa dia hari-hari, saya kat sini jauh, tak jumpa dia. Jumpa pon kalau kiteorg skype and on webcam.
Then he said, “Awak tak sayang saya? 5 tahun saya tak boleh lupa awak.” Kalau tak try mane taw kan. Tapi awak nak ke kalau dia couple ngan awak tapi hati dia bukan kat awak? Rindu dia bukan kat awak? Lagi sakit hati kan? Lagi fake kan? Walau saya rela tapi dia tak rela saya pun tak boleh nak buat apa-apa. Memang nampak kan saya macam buat bodoh, tak caring kat dia, and you can be better than me. You can pamper him everyday, unlike me, I am mean girl, maybe the meanest one, the coldest one. But inside me, who knows the best? Dia pon tak taw kan.
Saya pun tak taw perasaan saya, tapi bila saya cuba nak ignore dia, cuba tak nak care pasal dia, cuba tak nak rindu, saya tak boleh sangat. Tak kiralah banyak mana band korea yang saya gila, yang saya minat, yang saya jeles bila ada fan kena kiss, saya tetap ingat dia. Sometime I hate this feeling, this feeling really annoyed me a lot. What annoyed me the most is I can’t kick it out. And its not like Einstein can solve it. Yeah you may feel the same.
I don’t know what can I do to help you. But I want to ask you nicely, don’t call him a fake anymore. I hope you will meet a very good guy, I know you are a good girl. You deserve better. Believe me, Lukman is not your type. This guy is really annoying, and he will annoy his partner till the end, and I’m the only girl who can endure him. Yolah, dekat 10 tahun dia duk annoy saya,
Okayh, panjang dah aku bebel nih. Bukan apa, cuma nak menyuarakan isi hati ni. Nak kasi clear sikit. Jangan marah-marah yer cik adek manis.
paperKELIP : Why this feeling make your chest in pain, macam kena serangan angina pektoris pon ada.
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